taking on taking off
This is not a New Year's resolution. I don't do those.
This is a life shift, a choice, a decision.
I definitely do those.
This test, this ongoing experiment presents different things: new stuff, seemingly new stuff, old familiar things, seemingly familiar things.
I have discovered, through subjective experience, that the super heightened stress cycles I put myself through are not so enjoyable anymore. The smaller, slower, easier-to-digest rollercoaster-cycles-of-angst... those are much more fascinating.
I have discovered also that being away from Mollie for an extended period --- and by extended I mean: more than a week --- is not good for me.
A "heightened stress cycle" that I once found to be enjoyable is now near intolerable.
So the resolution, the shift I require, is "Simplicity".
To me that means not taking on excessive tasks within impossible deadlines. That's not my speed anymore.
It means staying close to home; close to the woman I love. Because that's where I feel most comfortable and most inspired. Simplicity.
It means not measuring my self or my life along the polarity of Success-Failure, but instead meandering along the path of happiness and ease.
Whatever brings those things is where i want to be.
all abstract and subject to interpretation, I know.
still, that is my meditation: Simplicity.